Monday, June 05, 2006, 00:24
well someone's on a flight outbound for amsterdam for a break
whilst im here coughin my life away, dreadin to go work tml
how contrasting this scene is
well its just another dreaded endless waiting for 10 days
how short these 10 days might seem
but yet how dreadfully long they might be to me
the past 6 months has been long, super duper long
with the exception of the short 10 days in mar/apr
there were happy moments
and there were definitely frustrating moments
and there were upsetting moments
and missing moments
but this might all just come to an end soon
and ill have my solace back with me
and baby would have this big small baby to look after permanently
till the next event of things/life takes us apart from each other
but thru this endless painstakingly long 6 months, each step was worth it
there were moments of questioning, undoubtingly
there were moments whereby its seemed the frustration seemed neverending
now that we're so close to the end,
there are times i can hardly believe it
maybe this is what we would call our 2nd chapter
a totally different experience we both shared right from the start
some might question the beginning
but not us.
from the start we knew where we were headin to
and our steps were in sync with each other
tiring i wld agree, more for baby
however tiring it was, there was not a moment whereby both of us had wanted to give it all up
for we knew we were worth more than that
and now, im just glad
a sense of relief that tis is all coming to an end
and anticipatin our 2nd chapter
till more comes along
well baby im gonna say the same thing ive always said to you since i came back
i miss you, and im gonna miss you more
till ure back from amsterdam, within e reach of technology
enjoy yourself, but remember to be good.
on the other hand
im so mentally tired out by work
they say in a flat hierachy company there are less politics and conflicts
i disagree
have you been stuck in that moment whereby frustration simply gets to you and all u see is the nearest door exiting this kinda life, the big brown door with the tempting silver handle
but reality smacks you, and one know that he/she has grown up, and walking out isnt the answer to everything
how much you would like to change things, but limitations are simply there?
that you just get so sick of the situation that nothing seems important to you, and u just move along, pushing everything to the back of your head, hoping your head wun explode with the enormous storage of displeasure/unhappiness/frustration?
times i wished my degree just wasnt that important to me at that given moment, for me to give up the job i craved and loved so much just for this stinking paper, not mentioning that i have to struggle so much and stress myself up so much just to achieve it?
but well that moment of choice has came and went, and now im left with no choice
im so bent on learning once more to take bus/mrt *in other words public transport other than cabs, cabs and more cabs*
i must i must i must
and it starts tml!
*i bet my flat ass on it this might not materialise* but i will try
