Wednesday, October 19, 2005, 12:45
a nice quiet walk downtown at 3am in the morning is simply refreshing
from a totally different perspective
[prob cuz it was a tues night? where there's supposedly no action]
the silent background, with the ocassional car noise
a different orchard rd from the way we usually know it
the empty roads,even the cabs in sight are minimal
the lights and the cooling airs
i lurve it
till...
i walked past crown prince's swensens
which reminded me of tons of things
of the ice cream treats i was showered upon
with my typical nonchalant 'whinin' abt me wantin ice cream
[its no wonder im fat]
but in exchange for the blissful love? aw,im willin to do it all over again
我只好把我想说的话都放在心里
因为我只想要你开心
我知道我回辛苦我会难过
但我这么都愿意
不在乎狂风暴雨
不管你在那里
我已经被你着迷
so there i was,
the physco manic me, walkin alone down town at 3am
takin snap shots of whatever i felt like
gonna do myself this favor & not upload any of the pics ive taken over the past few days. it wld be my private collection [grinz cheekily]
and oh ya,not forgettin my super loyal mp3 player that accompanied me thru the walk
it was simply... pleasant...
how i wished we ever took such walks when we had the chance to
it seems thou im 'completin' the things i had wished i done with him alone
[lil june is swallowin her sorrows
she closed her eyes as she left for the skies]
im back to checkin my office emails
time to clear my work,which ive been slackin off
TK's on the verge of killing me
Willie & the rest are complaining that the office's super quiet without me around [haha, im so much a noise pollutant man]
i quote from the email ' no crazy laughter, no sudden screaming and weird noises. no more complaining of 'where's my this and that?' no more of louding clickin of heels and the fumble and mumble. no more sad mp3s playing in the background'
goodness, i knew i was noisy.. but i nv knew i was SO noisy
am i terrible or what?
hmmz... but the guys and girls are sweet.. to make me feel that my prescence is missed in the office
[pls dun leave me behind, no dun tell me love is blind
a lil love is all i ask, and that is all
love... ive been searchin so long
a lil sadness when ure gone
i wana spread my wings but i just cant fly...
ocean deep... im so afraid to show my feelings
ive sailed a million seas
solitary room
will i ever find a lover?
maybe he has found another
and as i cry myself to sleep
i know this love of mine will be ocean deep
love, cant u hear when i call?
i just did my usual all time fav...jumping on the bed!!!
too bad i aint tall enuff to touch the ceilings
how short fart ass can i get?
in the midst, bobo fell unto the floor
*ouch*
oh, did i mention tat im gonna go take my degree???
*finally as quoted from my mummy & daddy*
[ahems] ure speakin to a soon to be office Uni SIM student in Jan2006
[haha, ah lo will smack me for sayin the above sentence, and of cuz of leavin her behind to take my uni studies first]
gerger,dun smack me. it was a sudden decision that i just suddenly decided when i begun to isolate myself
that i just felt like doing it
i will wait for u, hurry go for july's intake
不顾一切的爱才算是爱
从来没有感慨一路走来
我不走开等你随时再回来
prob wld have to thank him now that everything's finalised
for i guess, in a way, he motivated me to study once more
in whatever sense, i cant put it into words
for i dunno where the motivation comes from
we nv spoke of studyin together
he aint the kind to study
and i wasnt willin to leave him for overseas studies
[much to my parent dismay, haha]
but now its all fallin into place
and vince.... i have to thank you for it
please be proud of me
i will work hard [ermx try my best la]
will u ever get to share this joy with me?
i truly hope so
so well, i guess ive blabbered enuff for the day
i shld get my day going [haha, at 14oo hrs]
it might be the end of my 'endless' break soon
and i wonder would i ever derive joy and peace from my work again when i go back
my emotions are still scurrying around
but im tryin my best to hold them into place
wish me well
'what cant be cured can be endured'
since i cant 'cure' myself of not loving him
i shall endure it
hopefully 1 day it wld all fade away
and i might be able to slowly diminish him within myself
如果你还爱我
你不会对我如此的冷漠
我只能含着眼泪默默地离开。。。
难道早已注定
不能真正拥有你
难道我真心付出一切只为了承受孤单和寂寞
虽然你没有说要离开我我已经感到你的爱已不属于我
我只能含着眼泪默默地离开。。。
i know the day that i can diminish him within myself
is the day im fine again
prob work or school would take his place
but never another one
he slipped into my heart once when i said no more
and now im even more guarded and careful
he had that special touch in him to go pass by my barriers when no1 could
but i believe i wun meet another such special guy ever
he found me when no1 could
and he loved me when no1 could
and i love him when i tot i cld love no1
he is special to me, no matter what they rest say
and he shall remain special
he is my motivation in life to go on
he is my motivation for the new things in my life
and he's the push factor in everything im sick of doing
